Benjamin is the owner and editor in chief at The Momus Online. He is known around campus for leaving parties early and typically has trouble talking to girls. If you ever meet him, approach him slowly or offer food to show that you are friendly.
Carly is a northerner who took on Greek life at a Southern state school and loved it. She enjoys long walks on the beach, but only if she’s going to the concession stand. Talk to her about sports and she’ll be your new best friend.
Drew is a senior Political Science student at a decent sized state school in New England. When hes not watching hockey he can be found admonishing his fraternity for being full of Clinton supporters or killing babies at his College Republican meetings.
Sam is a mechanical engineering major from Virginia. He chose to go to Cleveland for school and regrets it every day. He’s also a diehard fan of all Washington sports teams. He’s evidently not good at decision making.
Vanessa Carlton Banks
You know I’d elephant walk a thousand miles if I could just see you tonight. My favorite band is The Who Do You Know Here? Contact: Email
Tyler “Max Power” Shaw is a junior at William and Mary. He thinks he’s pretty funny, but most people don’t, and a good amount of his jokes are stolen from other people. Despite being 5 foot 6, he is unable to dunk a basketball.
Chadwick Merriweather III
My name is Chadwick Merriweather III and I’m a junior at Michigan State University. I enjoy long walks on the beach and my favorite color is blue. Please understand that everything I write is not meant to be serious and it is all completely satire.
Boozer Sooner is a Junior Political Science major and does not enjoy talking about politics all the time. He also is an avid sports watcher and thinks himself an athelete despite him not working out or playing sports since highschool.
Grace is a music major and has heard the “band camp” joke more times than she can count. She enjoys crafting, themed parties, fried chicken, and weird marching band tan lines.
He goes to a school with small Greek Life, which is his reasoning whenever people accost him for being a TKE. You can find him with booze or women, or perusing your local titty bar. His bio was too short and messed up formatting.
Writer for The Momus Online. Risk Manager for Two years. Outlook on Life: Sarcastically Bleak. Embedded on the front line of Tau Kappa Epsilon
I joined a fraternity for the community service aspect. Or at least that’s what I told my parents.
Chad goes to school in New England and enjoys two or twelve Busch lattes on his days off. He has a professonal dad bod and always does a weak handshake upfront to establish that he’s not a threat.
There’s not a beer he hasn’t drank and a woman he hasn’t disappointed. He’ll make it to the gym if he has time but only to workout arms. Part-time contributor and slacking off all the other times.